James 1 and Psalm 63

Wow Lord… Thank You so much for being in control of this madness! Thank You that You are fortifying me. Thank You that You are holding up Your promise that You will not give us more than we can bear. Thank You for the encouragement of Psalm 63 and for the somber reminders in James 1. i pray that You will help me to do You will today! Please bless me for the doing the right thing, but first of all please cause me and help me to do the right thing! My only desire is to please You.. Whatever that takes! Lord, it scares me, but do whatever it takes for me to be able to bring You glory in my life! i love You and need You oooooh so much! and i know that the Winstead family need You so badly right now. Please bring peace and wisdom to them, and ultimately an unnatural belief that You are in control of all of this, and have a purpose! i love You! i also pray for Keith…. i can’t even begin to process what he is thinking… i just pray that the Holy Spirit would bang down his door… That he would have his road to damascus moment when there is no more denying You. Lord, i know You are capable. i love You!

Matt 7

7 “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.
8 For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened.
9 Or which one of you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone?
10 Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent?
11 If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!

Lord… wow!!!! This whole thing with Keith is insane… why? Why couldn’t You have just provide for him and his needs! He knocked and asked for years! He was trying to do the right thing! Lord, while i have these questions… i still have my shield of faith that just says… he shoulda waited… how do we know it wouldn’t have been just a couple more weeks before all the finance problems would be taken care of… We don’t. Lord, You are big and in charge and You have a plan even if we don’t know it or believe it’s a good one. Lord, i love You sooooooo much! i reeeeeealllly need You now if i’m supposed to run CR. i know i can do it with You and a strong support team! Lord, i love You!!! Fortify me in this time… shine through me so it’s undeniable that it’s You. i don’t want people to talk about me…. i want them to talk about You! Lord, help me to say Friday what You want me to say.. i have a feeling You want me to talk about the prostitute and Jesus telling the Pharisees to throw the first stone… i pray that You’ll give me courage and strength! i love You!

Matthew 6

1 “Beware of practicing your righteousness before other people in order to be seen by them, for then you will have no reward from your Father who is in heaven.
2 “Thus, when you give to the needy, sound no trumpet before you, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may be praised by others. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward.
3 But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing,
4 so that your giving may be in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you.

God, i don’t know why but here i am struggling to journal again. Lord, i want to see and feel and hear You when i journal. i think it’s hard sometimes to just have faith that going through the motions, i can still connect with You… Probably because sometimes it’s hard to. Lord, i pray that You’ll help me to do it anyway! i don’t know what the deal is but i just can’t keep up with it sometimes. Thank You for reminding me to do it today. i pray that i’ll be a good steward of my time and other resources for You! Better yet, help me be a tool in Your hands just to do whatever You desire! i love You and i hope that even if i don’t really mean that, which i think i do, but i pray that You’ll help me to really truly want that inside. i love You!

Matt. 1

Lord, i’m trying to read the parts of the Bible about Your life, because like Keith said, i want to learn how to do life like You did it! Help me to do that, and i pray that You will honor that motivation and help me to learn and get out of it what You would have me to get out of it everyday! i pray for Your Holy Spirit to come and rest on me like it did with Jesus. i know that You say He is here right now, so i pray that i would at least become more aware of it! Please help me to have an effective day and to get a lot done, so i can move on to the church website! i love You!

Genesis 5-8
Lord, thank You for the beautiful day and the non-buggy morning where i could sit outside. Thank You for all that You have done for me and for giving me this web dev work. It is so fun! Lord, i don’t know what the deal is, but i’ve been having weird sensations like not being able to focus on what i’m looking at, even as i type. And last night, i started to get fuzzy and lose feeling in my fingertips and and spotty blurred vision. Lord, i pray that You’ll heal me of this so that i can keep working! Lord, i love You so much! i pray that i’ll do what You would have me to do today and that i would be your servant, even if it’s just to work on websites. i love You!

Genesis 3-5

Lord, thank You for the talk with Mitch yesterday.. i pray that You’ll work with him on his issues…. Lord, i don’t know what it will take, but i want to see him come out on the other side desperately! Lord, i pray that You’ll help me to say the right things, and not to try and fix him. Lord, i pray that You will fix him and make him a gleeming example of someone who has been miraculously touched by You. i pray that he becomes a major standout to his family and to the Latino community. Lord, i love You and thank You for what You are doing in my life. i pray You’ll give me wisdom to do what i should, and that You’ll help me stay on task. Help the leaders’ training to go well Saturday. Lord, thank You so much for the rainy day yesterday. It was so refreshing. i love You!

Colossians 2
These have indeed an appearance of wisdom in promoting self-made religion and asceticism and severity to the body, but they are of no value in stopping the indulgence of the flesh.

Lord, thank You for the freedom that You afforded to us with Jesus’ death on the cross. i know my thoughts are so small-minded, because i’m just glad i can get tattoos, but really that freedom is so much more! Lord, i pray that You’ll help me to pick out tattoos that glorify You! i know that You can do that, and i just pray that You’ll help me with that. Also, please forgive me for looking at the half naked pictures this morning. Why is it that i use my partners CE reports as an excuse to look at stuff? i pray that You’ll forgive me, and that You’ll “create in me a clean heart, and restore a right spirit within me.” Please take my taste for it away, and thank You for how far You’ve brought me in that department! It truly is absolutely amazing! i DO NOT want to go backwards! Thank You again for making me a Pastor… or whatever it is that i am now… i pray that You’ll again, help me to use it to Your glory! i love YOu! Please help my hands to do Your work today, and my feet to go where You want them to go! i pray You’ll bring an extra blessing to CR tonight and that people would start coming in droves! i love You!

Colossians 1

21 And you, who once were alienated and hostile in mind, doing evil deeds,
22 he has now reconciled in his body of flesh by his death, in order to present you holy and blameless and above reproach before him,

Wow… a lot has happened since i journaled last! Friday night i gave my testimony, and it felt so great! Thank You for giving me that opportunity and thank You that it reached several people. Also, Sunday night, we had our Comm 101 Ceremony and we were all given a license! That’s pretty cool! Thank You for that and for what it means in my life. It seems like an answer to so many prayers, and yet i still don’t feel like i’m there. i’ve been wrestling with this since we got it… i feel like it’s mostly pride, and desire for power, or recognition, especially when i compare myself to some of the others in the room. Lord, help me replace my earthly desires, for desires to bring You glory! Lord, i want a passion for the lost! Please give me and extreme passion for the lost and the hurting. Please let me be a vessel for You in reaching and changing people. Thank You for how You have used me so far. There is no greater blessing! i pray that You’ll keep me humble as i remember my downfalls and also as i just remember how big You really are! i pray that You’ll help me to be and do the right things for Joel, and Mitch… Mitch i just feel really down and negative about, and i can’t help but want to preach at him every time. i pray that You’ll direct my words and attitude with him. You’ve helped me in the past, & i pray You’ll help me again. With Joel, i just don’t know what to do… He obviously doesn’t want me for a sponsor, and often i feel like he doesn’t even care about meeting, unless it’s to get stuff off his chest… Is that right? Is that what i’m supposed to do? If so, please help me to do it well! Lord, i love You! i’m giving this day to You and trust that You will make it right and that You’ll work through me. i pray You’ll continue to work in me in order to present me Holy and blameless and above reproach!

http://www.newspring.cc/study/one/day/why-jesus-came/

John 1:1–2:11 —»
Proverbs 1 —»

Lord, thank You for what You are doing in my life. Lord, i’m listening to “The Shack” audiobook and wow! i’m surprised at how uplifting it is! i love hearing someone describe You how they think You to be… Even though i KNOW it falls faaaaaar short of who You really are, it definitely serves as a reminder. i know i want to love that Jesus the way the main character loved Jesus. It’s something i have such a hard time grasping. i usually just end up addressing… i think it’s all 3 of You with “Lord.” i don’t know what’s right, but that feels pretty right. i want You to be Lord of my life… i don’t want to clean to any lordship of my own. God, i pray You’ll help me today to give up my rights and yield to Your working in and through me! i pray that my testimony will affect everybody in the room and that You’ll use it for Your glory! i know You can take the years the locusts have eaten and multiply them! i pray for that tonight! i long for Your approval and presence in my life! i love You Lord!

Philippians 3

Lord, thank You for another day to operate through You! i pray that i would be a willing vessel for You. i know i don’t feel the greatest, being tired, and having this weird pain in my groin area. Lord, i pray that You’ll help me with this pain and that it will not be serious. Thank You for Your blessings in my life. Thank You for letting me sing at church yesterday. i pray that we brought You glory. i also pray that i’ll bring You glory today. Lord, i’m trusting that You will work through me today! Let my work be anointed. Help me meeting with Andru to go well. thank You and i love You!